growing up grayson: eight months…

dear grayson,

QUIT IT!!! stop growing up SO FAST! you’re killing me!

hehe… kidding, only kidding of course. starting off as a 35 weeker and not knowing as to what pace you were going to grow, you are a BEST CASE SCENARIO… in every way possible. you have lit up my life and made it better in every way. you are my sunshine! (yes, your mother is ALL kinds of nerd. might as well come to terms with it now…)

this month has been the funnest. you have grown a TON! you are a whopping 22 pounds now! (and that’s only estimating… since we went to the doc two weeks ago)… you’re chowing down on solid foods like a champ. you LOVE getting ice cubes in your little munchkin netty contraption (p.s. THANK you to the awesome person who invented that little piece of baby genius!)… you are a mamas boy, there’s no doubt about that… but you get so excited to see your daddy. in fact so excited… you’re first legit word was DADA this month… and now you say it nonstop… we’ve had to patch that little eye of yours two hours a day this month… which you’ve been gracious enough not to mind… thanks for that, btw… you are officially on the move. if you want something… you go and get it! I hope this is a tell of what you’re going to be like when you grow up… your daddy is something of a go-getter himself… I’m sure you’ll make him proud… in fact, I know you already are…

the three of us woke up slowly this morning… and I asked your daddy what he thought about this stage. I told him I missed the newborn snuggliness and he said he wouldn’t go back if you paid him… he’s enjoying the stage you’re in right now. laughing, giggling when you’re tickled (you are wildly tickelish… EVERYWHERE.), picking up toys, eating our food, driving the dogs batty with your newfound mobility… what can I say kid? you’re the bomb. the apple of our eye I suppose… and I would not trade a moment of being your mama for anything. you are a true gem. I love you with every ounce of my being… so keep growing, eating us out of house and home, waking me up at all hours of the night, pooping in public places (cloth diapers make this interesting…), and spitting up on every one of my outfits… because you’re worth it all… every single crazy minute…

you’re all the baby I could ask for… can’t wait to see what kind of kid you become. (it’s okay if you take your time though…)

Love,

mama

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sisterly love.

are you sure you want her to stay for EIGHT days? my mom exclaimed over the phone…

yes, mom… she’s great with g. I could seriously use the break… I said with a sigh. it was only my forth time telling her this. we were trying to iron out the details of my sisters upcoming trip to texas.

alright then. I’ll book it when I get home tonight. and with that, my mom hung up the phone with a giggle. my sister was only 21 days away from coming to visit! I could hardly wait!

the night I went to pick heather up from the airport I was filled with excitement. I could not WAIT to squeeze her and see her love on her nephew for only the third time since his birth… I could not wait to show her our new home and stay up late talking and eating… but the one thing I forgot all about…

the fighting.

my sister and I are honest to god sisters. no mushy stuff with these two. we’re the kind that want to kill each other at the end of each day. I suppose it’s partly because we can be our truest selves with each other… and those selves? could not be more opposite. and if there is one thing my sister can do better than anyone… it’s get one my nerves!! this trip was packed full of the highest highs and the lowest of lows… and there was more than one occasion when I seriously wanted to punch her in the mouth… and I’m sure she had the same thought a time or two. for us? it’s just part of being sisters. we grouch at each other… and by the last day of her trip? I. Was. Done.

OH. MY. FREAKING. GOD! UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I heard my sister scream from her room… she came stomping out, not unusual for her… but this time I knew something was up…

they cancelled my flight and booked me on another one to LA at 9:30! it was 9:00, there was no way we were going to make it.

okay, okay, calm down… call them and they’ll get it figured out for you… don’t stress… as I said the words I just had to laugh… the last visit we had she got stranded in connecticut because of a huge blizzard. this was just too funny.

she did get the flight all squared away, but it wouldn’t be until the next day. I think it was a blessing in disguise. she and I went out… had frozen yogurt… giggled at g when he had a massive poopy diaper in uber snobby belks… and talked like we hadn’t been annoying the snot out of one another for the past eight days. it was awesome. it was god’s little way of saying, hey… you only have one sister! come on!

the trip ended up ending on a high note. which was nice. we grouched at each other the entire way to the airport, you’re breathing loud! stop smacking! get on your side of the armrest! but hey, we lasted a whole extra day people. the second she stepped out of my little suv that was currently holding my sleeping almost eight month old (tomorrow! AHHH!), my heart swelled with sadness. overwhelmingly so. I was going to miss her. deeply. as I watched her walk away there was a fresh lump forming in my throat… unexpected as we literally griped at each other as we got out of the car, are you seriously going to leave your empty soda cup in the center console?… but here’s the thing. she’s my one and only sister… and for better or worse… I love her. even if we still can’t figure out how we could possibly be related… and I hate that as I sit here typing and listening to g sing his goodnight songs to himself, she’s in the air flying fifteen hundred miles away from me to her home. I will miss you heather… even if sometimes you could use a good punch in the mouth. love always, your one and only, OLDER and WISER sister, sara. xoxo.

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just breathe.

sooooooooooooo. my mood is much improved since the last time we met. we’ve been super busy… and for sara? busy is best. right now I’m exhausted… it was 105 here today! the past few days have been spent running around texas… today we went to the dallas world aquarium… flipping amazing. but we’ll have to catch up later… as for now… I’ll leave you with my favorite picture from today. a father and son moment. john works A LOT. so moments like these make my heart happy. I feel overwhelmed with pride when I look at this… because you can totally see that in john. he’s incredibly proud to be able to take his son to his first aquarium… it was incredible to watch. I needed it. anywho, that’s all for now. night night friends…

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motion = madness…

someone wise once told me, enjoy this time… because once your baby starts crawling around? it’s all over. I listened, half-heartedly, and shoved it away into a deep crevice in my brain where all the other useless information other parents give out… whether you ask or not.

well. this person? was right on the money. my kid has been in motion for about a week… and? it’s all over people. I can’t set him on the floor with a toy anymore and do the dishes. I can’t even put him in his bouncer for ten minutes and expect him to be content… this baby wants to MOVE. he knows he can do it now… and nothing else is even close to that kind of cool. which leaves me feeling both clausterphobic and exhausted. also now that he knows these new cool tricks? he is boycotting sleep. he’ll give in the occasional nap… and he’s back to waking up two to five times a night again. I’M GROUCHY!!! I could seriously rip my eyes out of their sockets at the moment. I literally want to pull my hair out. I’m tired and during the daytime I’m a grouch… I now know that sleep is a precious gift… and when you’re not getting it? well… we’ve already gone over that… haven’t we? I love my baby… but I’m a much better mama when I’m well rested… so g, GET SOME SLEEP! I’m wondering if he’s getting teeth, too? I’ve been thinking he was teething for months now… and we still have no teeth. I guess they could be on their way.

in nicer news… my sister is here visiting! we’ve just been hanging out. watching girly tv shows. taking care of the little man. we took him to the fort worth zoo the other day… awesome zoo, but it was TOO FREAKING HOT. yet another thing on my to-do… SUMMER WARDROBE! anywho, I should get back… just thought I’d say hello… that’s all for now… toodloo…

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now that wasn’t so bad…

oh my goodness gracious… today was such an awesome day. from start to finish. g’s rash is finally ::knocking on wood vigorously:: starting to subside. he was in a great mood from the moment he woke up this morning. john got to hang out with us… we went to the park in our subdivision and g got to swing for the first time ever… and slide down the slide with daddy. looking at the pics cracked me up. I thought g got his skin tone from me… but dang! my husband is WHITE! haha. the cast of the jersey shore would have a hay day with us… it was an awesome morning…

THEN! after I went grocery shopping BY MYSELF… ::win:: I came home to an awesome package from g’s grandma and grandpa j… grandma j made g the most amazing quilt. I cannot wait to post pictures! it’s so so so adorable… and? it’s super soft. g was already smooshing his face in it. they also sent him a really cute stuffed frog… (he was all over that in about two seconds flat…) a shirt from one of their recent trips… best part (aside from the quilt, of course)? COWBOY BOOT SOCKS! I about died from cute alone. I could not WAIT to put them on him. they are SO ADORABLE… and they sent a pair in about every color… this kid is really a texan now people…

anywho, I’m tired. SO SUPER EXCITED that john has a three day weekend. I cannot remember the last time john had a three day weekend that did not involve moving. I. am. giddy! plus, on tuesday my sister arrives!!! can’t wait to show her around texas… I’ve got some fun stuff planned for her, g and I while john is working… looking forward to it!

that’s all for now… nighty night friends…

p.s. is this sort of turning into a photo blog? okay maybe… but I am OBSESSED with this camera… and getting photos of the little man everyday never hurt, right?

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oh the drama…

today has been… a day. a horrid kind of day. the kind of day you want to rewind and skip! but, obv we can’t do that, so why don’t I blog about it already.

g has had an INSANE rash for the last couple of weeks (yes, it’s been that long. not exaggerating.). we’ve seen the peed three times for it and nothing seems to be helping. if it’s still here in a week I have to take him back to the peed for some tests. it’s a very angry rash that worries the crap out of me… and up until the last couple of days he didn’t seem to notice… but the last couple of days he’s been super whiny and obv uncomfortable… so it’s been not so smiley around here. combine that with teething and a monstrous growth spurt (21 and a half pounds!!!)… and you’ve got yourself a recipe for an incredible grouchy baby and a frantic mama. I’m tired! so… long story short… I’m glad today is done. hoping and praying this rash goes away soon and it becomes a distant memory… until then, pray my nerves don’t curl up in a ball and die. mmmk? moving on to the happy stuff…

g army crawled for the first time today!!!! best part? john and I BOTH witnessed it! it was all kinds of awesome. he saw a toy he wanted and he dragged himself on over to it… all kinds of amazing. on the flip side… he now knows he can get where ever he wants… which is not always a good thing… but it’s still fun to watch him explore his surroundings…

on another awesome note… g’s smartrike came today! it’s a gadget I’ve been eyeing since before he was born, but it’s wicked expensive… so I wasn’t going to get one. but then the other day good ole’ zulily had a sale on it… I couldn’t help myself… I pounced!! it took about a million years to put together and a million breaks to tend to my super grouchy and mega whiny almost 8 month old, but once it was done… it was fabulous! I’m super stoked on it. once I got it put together g and I took a walk. which was great because it gave both of us some much needed fresh air and it gave him some time to chill out… okay, gave both of us some time to chill out… best part? the greenbelt in our neighborhood was full of little brown bunnies! they must have followed us here from connecticut! they were so cute!!! anywho, it was the perfect end to a challenging day… and now g is sound asleep and I? well I get to have time to RELAX. nighty night friends…

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sun + our own backyard =

…amazing!

we’ve been enjoying the sun today. after that scary storm last night it was nice to be able to be outside and not have to worry too much (other than sunburn obv.)… g’s eyes are suuuuuuuuuuper sensitive to light so we didn’t stay out long… but man, what a treat. I’m almost certain sun is an active ingredient in ones happiness… so, texas… thanks for making it up to me!

 p.s. baby crocs? um, yes… wicked adorable. thanks A.P.!!

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dear connecticut {a love letter}

(photo by kristen young.)

to my dear sweet connecticut,

in leaving you, there was a part of me that was filled with pure joy. I could not WAIT to get away from horrible, grouchiness infested… connecticut. but now, as I sit perched at my desk in texas there is a part of me that misses you and would like to thank you for the last three years. don’t get me wrong, I’m not regretting leaving… but, you weren’t so bad.

you were the place where I became a woman. yes, obviously… I was already 22 and married when I met you, but (to quote b spears… ha.) I was not a girl, not yet a woman ::POW:: I had a TON of things going on in my life at that time and I wasn’t mature enough to understand it. looking back? you were quite possibly one of the best things to ever happen to me. you took me away from familiar and let me grow on my own into the woman I am today… and for that? I’m grateful. not to mention some of the amazing experiences I got to have… nyc anyone? rhode island. mass. new jersey. essentially the entire east coast from mass down… I’ve been able to see… which is something this little small town girl from gridley, california never thought would happen…

my marriage blossomed in connecticut. it was rough. those first years. getting acquainted. which I thought was impossible because we’d been dating since 2002! but marriage is a whole different ball game. it’s sort of like you wake up one day and realize you will be connected to this person all of your life. sort of scary! doesn’t matter who you are… especially since my life had only begun… luckily, I chose the right dude. even with the 80+ hours a week he was working… we stuck by each other… and here we are… happy and together… and we know we can get through most things without even sweating it. okay, okay, there may have been a little sweat involved… and a few tears… details. details.

I spent my entire pukey first pregnancy with you. you barely even noticed. I didn’t have the pregnancy where people walked up and rubbed my belly… I’m pretty sure for most of my pregnancy people looked at me and thought… wow, she’s gaining weight! on the other hand though… you gave me the most incredible ob-gyn on the planet. I’m pretty sure I would have happily stuffed her into my luggage and brought her with me to texas… she treated me with the same respect as any other freakingoutfirsttimemom… and she didn’t ask me why I was having babies so young… oh and p.s. connecticut, just in case you’re wondering… mid-twenties IS NOT TOO YOUNG TO HAVE BABIES. just sayin’. ahem, anyways… I’m super thankful that I was able to have such a wonderful birth experience even though g was early and I did have a mild freak out.

I met some life-long wonderful friends during my time with you. (hi, katherine! hi, alison! hi, shelly! hi, liz!) friends I would have never had the chance to make had I never taken a leap and followed my husband across the country. I am all kinds of grateful for that. sometimes I can be a little socially anxious… it was nice to meet some people I could just be ME with. it was not easy to leave them. this is a fact.

all and all, I am going to remember you as part of the journey. you helped my husband with his career and you helped me grow into the woman I am now. you welcomed my son with open arms… and that I will be forever grateful for. but would I run back to you right now? not a chance. I don’t know if you know this… but texas is kind of the bomb… insane storms and all.

love, sara

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2 hours a day…

of pure stinking cuteness. since returning to the eye doc last week we have had to patch g’s eye not for one, but for TWO hours a day. a sentence I thought would be unbearable… but he’s been super good about it this time… almost like he knows it’s crunch time for that sweet little eye of his. doc said he’s most likely going to end up in glasses regardless… which is a bummer… it’s just a matter of when… I’m hoping these patches will help work a miracle… we shall see. on the other hand though… if he can make a patch cute… surely he can rock glasses… that’s all for now. toodloo…

oh and p.s. where are his uff da eye patches? unfortunately, this kiddos head grew to monstrous proportions… haha. no but seriously, his head got too big. seriously.

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lately…

can I just start by saying my ABSOLUTE favorite thing about texas is the very fabulous fact that john now only works every SIXTH weekend?! if I had known in advance that that was going to be the case I would have moved JUST for that. seriously! it’s been so so so nice having him around on the weekends… and even better? he’s not a zombie. that my friends… is priceless. (especially because he’s been working his tail off hanging pictures, putting up decals, erecting furniture… there is no rest for him to be had right now!)

we’ve been wicked busy. moving is a process… we are now the proud owners of a garage… we were super stoked to be able to park our cars in it… but what happens when you go from having a basement… to not having a basement? crap overload. it’s taking over our garage as we speak… and we have yet to be able to park a car in it. dear lord… help us sort through stuff… we don’t want an overgrown junk drawer! it’ll happen I suppose… in time. ugh. patience… so not my fortay.

in other news… the kid is getting cuter and cuter by the hour. and now that I have this super spiffy camera I’m trying to teach myself how to use… I’m snapping photos like crazy. I’m going to keep this post short… for moving has fried most of my remaining brain cells… here’s some photos from the last couple of days…

notice the furry helper to your left. he’s making sure daddy’s got it under control. john decided to do g’s night time routine friday night so I could get ready for our… ::gasp:: date!!

baxter supervising… funny story – during our cross-country road trip, one of the hotels we stayed in had a monstrous tub. I mean massive. probably the largest tub I’ve seen in my entire life… while john walked the dogs, g and I got in the humdinger of a bathtub and I was giving him his bath when ::SPLASH!!!:: out of nowhere baxter came plowing in 90 miles an hour and jumped into the bath… I’m laughing as I type this. it still gets me. his face was priceless… it was like mid-air baxter realized OH SH*&%?!!!! hilarious. john said he heard baxter yelp all the way across the suite. too funny. this dog is hysterical I telll you.

waiting for the ::AWESOME:: babysitter…

saturday and sunday were spent doing a whole lot of nothing… besides unpacking obviously… but it made for awesome pics of the little man…

he’s sitting up and rocking back and forth on all fours… I’m pretty sure crawling is only a matter of time and determination on his part…

this is the face you get when you walk into g’s room after he’s napped and you greet him with, where’s my baby! p.s. that is drool spots from his one nap… he doesn’t sleep on nasty sheets. mmmk? I’m over it.

this is quite possibly my favorite picture… to date. this is his pre-dinner face from tonight…

this is his post-dinner face… bless him. he’s precious I tell you.

and that’s all I’ve got for now. see you on the flip side.

toodloo…

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