I’m not going to even try to deny it. I’ve been dreading going back to work. I mean anxiously, not sleeping at night, dreaaaaaaaaaading leaving my son for a set number of hours a day. I’ve thought and thought about how I could rearrange our finances to make it work… and really, we could make it work… but honestly, it’s nice to have a little extra… especially with the baby… and saving for another house… that’s probably priority number one right now. so, long story short, I have to return.
so, today. I went in just for an hour or two… so my co-worker could show me all the changes that have been made (we’re going paperless. woot!). I was all stressed out thinking there was going to be a ton of things for me to learn. nope. it’s pretty much all the same… and my co-worker and I get along famously, so it was nice to go in even if to just chat with her… and honestly, it was a GODSEND. because now, not only am I not anxious about going back… I’m excited. it was nice to be reminded why I love my job.
tomorrow is my first official day back… and I’m ready. I love our clients and their pets… and my co–workers are great… so, I’m looking forward to it. plus, I was actually needed for something while I was there… and I’m not gonna lie, that was nice to know too.
at the moment I’m sitting on the couch in my living room typing on my netbook… with my baby on my chest in his sling. I’m here to tell you, life doesn’t get much better than this. for some reason, something clicked the other day. I was changing his diaper and he looked at me… and the way he looked at me made my heart swell for some reason… like he knew who I was… and since then, I haven’t been able to put him down when we’re together. I could just cuddle him crazy, I swear. but I think it’s been better for the both of us. I”m more relaxed… he’s sleeping better… TWO NIGHTS IN A ROW – FOUR HOUR STRETCHES! woot! now I’m starting to feel like we’re really bonding… it’s kind of exciting.
so, I’m sure you can tell. I’m in a much better place today mood wise. thankthelordjesus… I guess anxiety will do that to you.
well, I”m getting off course and setting into ramblesville… so toodloo for now.