Tag Archives: love

sisterly love.

are you sure you want her to stay for EIGHT days? my mom exclaimed over the phone…

yes, mom… she’s great with g. I could seriously use the break… I said with a sigh. it was only my forth time telling her this. we were trying to iron out the details of my sisters upcoming trip to texas.

alright then. I’ll book it when I get home tonight. and with that, my mom hung up the phone with a giggle. my sister was only 21 days away from coming to visit! I could hardly wait!

the night I went to pick heather up from the airport I was filled with excitement. I could not WAIT to squeeze her and see her love on her nephew for only the third time since his birth… I could not wait to show her our new home and stay up late talking and eating… but the one thing I forgot all about…

the fighting.

my sister and I are honest to god sisters. no mushy stuff with these two. we’re the kind that want to kill each other at the end of each day. I suppose it’s partly because we can be our truest selves with each other… and those selves? could not be more opposite. and if there is one thing my sister can do better than anyone… it’s get one my nerves!! this trip was packed full of the highest highs and the lowest of lows… and there was more than one occasion when I seriously wanted to punch her in the mouth… and I’m sure she had the same thought a time or two. for us? it’s just part of being sisters. we grouch at each other… and by the last day of her trip? I. Was. Done.

OH. MY. FREAKING. GOD! UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I heard my sister scream from her room… she came stomping out, not unusual for her… but this time I knew something was up…

they cancelled my flight and booked me on another one to LA at 9:30! it was 9:00, there was no way we were going to make it.

okay, okay, calm down… call them and they’ll get it figured out for you… don’t stress… as I said the words I just had to laugh… the last visit we had she got stranded in connecticut because of a huge blizzard. this was just too funny.

she did get the flight all squared away, but it wouldn’t be until the next day. I think it was a blessing in disguise. she and I went out… had frozen yogurt… giggled at g when he had a massive poopy diaper in uber snobby belks… and talked like we hadn’t been annoying the snot out of one another for the past eight days. it was awesome. it was god’s little way of saying, hey… you only have one sister! come on!

the trip ended up ending on a high note. which was nice. we grouched at each other the entire way to the airport, you’re breathing loud! stop smacking! get on your side of the armrest! but hey, we lasted a whole extra day people. the second she stepped out of my little suv that was currently holding my sleeping almost eight month old (tomorrow! AHHH!), my heart swelled with sadness. overwhelmingly so. I was going to miss her. deeply. as I watched her walk away there was a fresh lump forming in my throat… unexpected as we literally griped at each other as we got out of the car, are you seriously going to leave your empty soda cup in the center console?… but here’s the thing. she’s my one and only sister… and for better or worse… I love her. even if we still can’t figure out how we could possibly be related… and I hate that as I sit here typing and listening to g sing his goodnight songs to himself, she’s in the air flying fifteen hundred miles away from me to her home. I will miss you heather… even if sometimes you could use a good punch in the mouth. love always, your one and only, OLDER and WISER sister, sara. xoxo.

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can I just start by saying my ABSOLUTE favorite thing about texas is the very fabulous fact that john now only works every SIXTH weekend?! if I had known in advance that that was going to be the case I would have moved JUST for that. seriously! it’s been so so so nice having him around on the weekends… and even better? he’s not a zombie. that my friends… is priceless. (especially because he’s been working his tail off hanging pictures, putting up decals, erecting furniture… there is no rest for him to be had right now!)

we’ve been wicked busy. moving is a process… we are now the proud owners of a garage… we were super stoked to be able to park our cars in it… but what happens when you go from having a basement… to not having a basement? crap overload. it’s taking over our garage as we speak… and we have yet to be able to park a car in it. dear lord… help us sort through stuff… we don’t want an overgrown junk drawer! it’ll happen I suppose… in time. ugh. patience… so not my fortay.

in other news… the kid is getting cuter and cuter by the hour. and now that I have this super spiffy camera I’m trying to teach myself how to use… I’m snapping photos like crazy. I’m going to keep this post short… for moving has fried most of my remaining brain cells… here’s some photos from the last couple of days…

notice the furry helper to your left. he’s making sure daddy’s got it under control. john decided to do g’s night time routine friday night so I could get ready for our… ::gasp:: date!!

baxter supervising… funny story – during our cross-country road trip, one of the hotels we stayed in had a monstrous tub. I mean massive. probably the largest tub I’ve seen in my entire life… while john walked the dogs, g and I got in the humdinger of a bathtub and I was giving him his bath when ::SPLASH!!!:: out of nowhere baxter came plowing in 90 miles an hour and jumped into the bath… I’m laughing as I type this. it still gets me. his face was priceless… it was like mid-air baxter realized OH SH*&%?!!!! hilarious. john said he heard baxter yelp all the way across the suite. too funny. this dog is hysterical I telll you.

waiting for the ::AWESOME:: babysitter…

saturday and sunday were spent doing a whole lot of nothing… besides unpacking obviously… but it made for awesome pics of the little man…

he’s sitting up and rocking back and forth on all fours… I’m pretty sure crawling is only a matter of time and determination on his part…

this is the face you get when you walk into g’s room after he’s napped and you greet him with, where’s my baby! p.s. that is drool spots from his one nap… he doesn’t sleep on nasty sheets. mmmk? I’m over it.

this is quite possibly my favorite picture… to date. this is his pre-dinner face from tonight…

this is his post-dinner face… bless him. he’s precious I tell you.

and that’s all I’ve got for now. see you on the flip side.


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and now we’re back… from outerspace!


it’s certainly been a while, hasn’t it! well, long story short… moving, is well… moving. a whole lot of details had to be ironed out. I’ve had about fifty thousand people in and out of my house… hooking up things, selling things, some successful, some not… last but definitely not least to be hooked up? that’s right, you guessed it… internet. so here I am… coming to you live from our new bedroom floor (no computer desk yet…) with speedy internet. woo hoo.

g and I have been keeping busy. unpacking. hanging with new people… (we signed up for three mommy and me groups… overzealous? why yes… slightly.) trying to get the lay of the land… it’s certainly an adventure. yesterday my mother’s day present arrived… john got me a dslr. color me stoked. I’ve been clicking pictures like a mad woman… I just need to learn how to use the dern thing… stay tuned…

g had an appt with the eye specialist this morning… at godawfulearly o’clock… LOVE the new doc. the one in ct was so dry and cold… the one here was pleasant and kind. and they even had a sign on the wall that said they would pray with us if we would like (LOVE THAT.). his eye is not getting better, unfortunately. he’s gotten even more far sighted in both eyes since the previous visit in ct… and he does have a “drifting” eye… we’re going to continue to patch and pray to god it gets better. we’ll see. I have to say though… this kid is a charmer. he had everyone in the office stopping to say hello. he’s almost scary chill though… sometimes I wonder…

dare I say it… g is becoming mobile! he’s not really getting anywhere yet, but the kid is on all fours and rocking back and forth… he’s grabbing for things far away and lunging his body to get them… it’s exciting to watch. I’m hopeful that when he does decide to crawl john will be here to witness it… and even if he’s not, I may not tell him. I don’t want him to feel like he’s missing anything… not really lying, right?

the house is coming along. it’s been a long time since I’ve been happy to come home to a house… it’s relaxing… I’ve got a kitchen worth cooking in… it’s exciting. once I get everything situated, I’ll post pics… we have a whole agenda of visitors coming this summer, so I want to get it ready before they arrive! can’t wait to see them all… can’t wait to see g in the pool this summer… just so much to look forward to!!!

I suppose that’s all there is time for now… just a little update on life… toodloo…

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growing up grayson: SEVEN months (what?!)

um… excuse me… how did this happen? how did we cross the halfway mark of my sons first year without a blink? this month has been insane. emotionally draining, stressful, and lonely for me… but at the same time it allowed a LOT of mama and grayson time… which I’m super thankful for… because? a RIDICULOUS amount of changes are happening with this kid. ridiculous I tell you… it’s all kinds of amazing.

◊ stats…

weight: 18 pounds 14 ounces (as of april 30th… I’m sure he’s gained since…)

height: honestly? not sure… I know he’s grown since last month, though…

◊ changes this month…

obsessed is not a strong enough word for grayson’s relationship with his feet. he is ALWAYS playing with his feet. it’s quite possibly the cutest thing ever. in the car on our cross country trip I would watch him in the mirror. I’m almost positive he held onto his feet for at least 12 hours of that trip.

he’s putting sounds together. right now it’s “boo… boo.” and it sounds like he’s reallllllly sounding it out like, “booooooooooboo.” which is my nickname for him. I’m always saying, what are you doin’ boo boo!

he’s sitting up unassisted. don’t get too excited though… it’s only when he’s in the mood. he’d still rather be doing push ups.

the most exciting new trick?! he’s getting up on all fours and rocking back and forth!!! it’s so close to crawling I could spit! seriously… he gets up… looks at me and rocks wildly! I cheer so loudly I’m sure the people in this hotel think I’m a weirdo…

◊ tricks perfected this month…

he officially puts himself to sleep. I can put him to bed at 7:30, he’ll talk to himself for about ten minutes… and then… ::SLEEP:: he’s a rockstar when it comes to sleep, but now all I have to do is his night time routine and put him in his crib. he’s the bomb. this was huge for me. night time is when I get ME time.

◊ things I adore about baby g this month…

this has been my favorite month so far. grayson is becoming a little human! he’s laughing. he’s grabbing things. he’s pinching me with his toes (which cracks me up because I pinch john with my toes all the time)… he’s sitting up. he’s bouncing. he’s enjoying going out and observing his surroundings. the kid is just SO fun right now. we spent much of the month just the two of us… and I enjoyed being able to hog him… (it was challenging at times, don’t get me wrong…) he totally kicked butt on our cross country road trip… takes after his mama, likes being in the car. although, I must admit I really think he got his personality from john. so laid back. so easy going. not really moody like mama… he’s a great fit in our little family. I feel like I fall in love with him more and more every day.

here are our pics from our seven month “hotel special” photo shoot… my memory card ATE all of my photos from the road trip and wouldn’t work for me… so I had to take these with my iphone… sorry for the crappy quality. not for long though! john got me a dslr for mothers day! fabulous pics coming soon to crazybabypants! woo hoo!!

until next time… toodloo!

happy seven months baby boy… mama loves you.

p.s. he’s OBSESSED with this drum. we saw it over at katherine and everly’s and my mom bought it for him shortly after that… this was a life saver when we were driving cross country. he LOVED banging on it. I did too… it’s NOT ANNOYING.

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becoming a mother.

when does motherhood begin?

is it when you see the two brand new shiny lines on the pregnancy test? is it when you excitedly run to your husband/boyfriend/partner/etc to share the news? is when the delivery nurses place that screaming pink baby on your chest? is it when you leave the hospital and realize this baby is yours for good? is motherhood a physical act or a emotional one? or both?

being around my mom for the last couple of days and hearing her refer to me as “mama” has got me wondering… when did I become mama? and then of course my brain went into… what qualifies me to be one? yes… that’s how I roll people.

my mom and I have had a rocky twenty six years together. we were never the bff’s she and my sister are… we drove each other batty pretty much the entire time. I was that girl that practically sprinted out the front door the day of my high school graduation… my mom’s favorite quote is… you were independent from the moment you were born. and she’s absolutely right… in a lot of ways, grayson has bridged the gap between my mom and I… a tiny little peace ambassador we both love. it’s a beautiful thing really… and something I’ve been yearning for for a long time…

motherhood for me started when I found out I was pregnant. all I cared about since that unforgettable moment  was to protect my little human. I would close the vents in my car when I was driving behind someone who was smoking thinking to myself, get that cancer stick away from my baby… I would make sure I ate right… even if it was just going to be puked up later. I would write him letters about who I hoped I could become for him. a mother. a strong woman. a loving wife to his daddy. I would pray and pray that god would protect him while he was housed in my imperfect shell… that to me is when I became a mother.

now that I’ve known him for six months. I’ve racked up countless smiles, gurgles, cries, moans, and squeals of delight… I know what motherhood is. it’s taking the good with the bad and making something out of it. it’s shaping this little human to be the best he can be. it’s putting him first but making time for myself. it’s not just a label. it’s not just a role. it’s a life choice. I chose to be a mother. and I fully intend on rocking it. maybe not everyday, but I’m going to do my best to be all I can be… and hopefully, someday in twenty six years or so… he can look at me while I hold his child and I call him daddy… and know he’s worthy of the title.

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sleep. precious sleep.

okay, so we all know I’ve been a serious grouchypants lately… part of the problem has been that g has had some serious sleep issues since returning from south carolina… it’s been rough… I feel like he went back to being like 6 weeks old… which, let’s face it… was not my favorite time…

yesterday, while g was napping I took it upon myself to read a book I bought a while back to learn how to sleep train him. I thought long and hard about how I wanted to go about the sleep thing… I knew I didn’t want to do the whole cry it out thing… it’s selfish really. I just can’t handle listening to him scream. it’s like nails on a chalkboard. it makes my stomach churn… so, I searched for another solution… and I found it.

the sleep easy solution by jennifer waldburger, lcsw and jill spivack, lcsw. I had only skimmed it up until yesterday because a) I read a blurp of it on amazon and got him sleeping before it was even delivered! and b) who has the time to read? (other than blogs, which I read when I’m feeding him…) I like this idea because it’s not hardcore cry it out, but it’s not pick him up and cuddle him every time he makes a slight noise of discomfort either. seems to be the best of both worlds…

anywho, I decided to adjust a few things for his bedtime routine last night per their suggestions…

♥ make sure the room is between 69 and 72 degrees (for some reason, I had it at        74-76… yikes!)

♥ put him in a blanket sleeper (he was sleeping in longies and a long sleeve shirt…      last night I put his dipe, a wool cover, and a blanket sleeper on him)

♥ don’t put music or the mobile on once he’s in the crib to go to sleep

♥ white noise (I ended up doing the nature sounds on the mobile… and the                    humidifier is always going…)

♥ keep his routine in tact. in the order he’s used to… our routine is as follows:

→ serious playtime between 5 and 6. standing up, bouncing, playing, laughing…

→ 6:15ish, bath time… while we wait for the bath to fill up he sits in his vibrating         bouncy chair in the bathroom.

→ 6:30-6:45 (pending on how long he wants to chill in the bath… he’s a serious             water baby) take him out of the bath… head to the changing table, where I                 have his dipe, cover, and blanket sleeper waiting…

→ put his dipe on… give him a mini-massage while lotioning him up…

→ once dressed we cozy up in the glider and I feed him while we read a book or             two…

→ put him in the crib, night light on… main light off. (the night light is more for           me… he doesn’t seem to mind the dark.)

♥ last but not least, don’t let him fall asleep while eating in your arms. put him in        the crib awake. (this was the hardest part for me.)

just by following these suggestions… he slept through the night! no problem… and he’s been a champion napper today, too. on schedule per this book. huge fan. HUGE. this is the second time I’ve followed just a few of their suggestions and he’s taken right to it… best part? I don’t have to listen to him cry his little eyes out in misery. it’s a win win.

so, last night I got to sleep 7 hours in a row. which was fabulous… then today.. I got to NAP for two hours while he napped… and now? he’s fast asleep… has been for an hour… which is right one time. I am a very happy mama right now. thanks sleep easy solution… you’re kind of my favorite.

that’s all for now, toodloo.

oh and p.s. today was a MUCH better day then this past weekend… I feel like I’m getting a handle on my emotions. maybe it was just lack of sleep… at least that’s what I’m going to blame it on…

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there are no words to describe what it’s like to be reunited with someone you love so freaking much… it makes you sick to think of them leaving. someone you don’t even have to think to be around. someone who makes you laugh so hard your face hurts at the end of the night… and you think so much alike you loose track of the amount of jinx action going on… someone you can talk to about anything… and know that no matter what truths you share, it will never alter the relationship… no. matter. what. basically, someone who gets you…

all of the above… sophie.

three years is way too long to go without seeing her. don’t get me wrong, I’m so freaking happy we’ve had the past three days to enjoy each other. but I will tell you right now… never again. we will see each other at least once a year… mark my words. on the other hand… we both needed this visit so badly right now… it’s bittersweet I suppose.

this weekend has been nothing short of amazing. from the moment I picked soph up from the airport it has been nonstop chatting, giggling, ikea-ing, target-ing, and even a day at the bronx zoo. it’s felt like a high school sleep over… the best kind… I can’t believe tomorrow morning is already time to take her back to the airport. the visit was too short… but I will take what I can get… and having her see g… and love on him. I can’t even tell you.

enough of my sappyness… let’s relive a highlight reel, shall we?

– I pick soph up at the airport… she tells me to pick her up in departures, she waits in arrivals… she does three flights of stairs… twice. it was highly hilarious.

– ikea new jersey… pear soda, hazelnut chocolate… heaven.

– explaining to soph my love of cloth diapers… hilarious.

– sophie meeting john – FINALLY! I cannot believe in the 8 years I’ve known and loved them both… this was the first time they met. crazy. they felt like they knew each other. hmph, I wonder why.

– sophie cuddling my baby. I’ve cuddled hers for years… it’s been awesome to see her cuddling mine.

– pf changs. pear mojito + hilarious memories + delish overpriced chinese = amazingness…

– bronx zoo… bears wrestling, seals coming right up to us, tortoises humping… awesome day.

it’s been a great trip. I know I’ve said that about a million times… but it’s so freaking true. not ready for her to leave. I love you, Soph!

in other news, I am NOT looking forward to my weigh-in tomorrow. HORRID week to start my diet… but I’m going to stay faithful to my weigh-ins regardless… and we cannot forget the target checker tonight… she finally said what everyone else thinks.

went to target by myself tonight while soph watched the kiddo… while checking out with three cans of g’s wayridiculouslyoverpricedformula.. the checker looked at me and said, “you have a child?” … “yes.”… “how old are you?!”… “I’m 18…” … “Yeah, I thought so.”… “I’m kidding, I’ll be 26 next month.”… “omg, I thought 18 was a stretch.” … wow, at least now I know why so many connecticans give me dirty looks… I look like a 12 year old apparently. stellar. I’m sure I’ll appreciate it at 40… but right now… not my favorite.

anywho, that’s all for now… going to hang with soph for a bit… skipping iphone photos this week… takes too long to get that post together… but I’ll continue it again next week. toodloo!

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week ten: iphone photos

this has been a nice routine week… I’m finally back in the swing of things at work… and our boy is on a sleeping schedule (what?! yeah.)… it’s been a pretty sweet week… if katherine wasn’t in colorado and we could’ve had our playdate… would have been even better… but you can’t have everything, right?

monday was pretty chill. john had to go to school and then straight to work… so, I decided to use my spare time (what’s that?) to make lunch/dinner… we turkey, mashed potatoes, and cranberry sauce… thanks for the idea katherine! it was delish. I ADORE my kitchenaid mixer. I think everyone who spends anytime cooking NEEDS one. plus, look how cute she is!

baxter’s been acting out like you would not believe lately. I’ve had a couple of moments where I wanted to scream… I understand his plight though… so I can’t be too too upset… but lord, please help him adjust. I can’t take too much more of this! but when he does this? I mean look at that face!

tuesday was back to work. it was a good day. this is our doc assistant. he’s so good with the animals. as you can see, this kitty is lovin’ it. haha. they don’t always cooperate.

one of our techs lovin’ on a clients dog… seven. isn’t he the cutest? I got chihuahua fever from this dog. he’s such a love.

I didn’t want to put him down… and he’s moving to oregon with his owner! so sad! (for me anyway.)

this is what I woke up to wednesday morning. he’s such a morning person… definitely doesn’t take after his mama.

laundry all day all night… I’m sure you other mamas out there can relate. my kid spits up nonstop… I change his outfit about fortyfivethousandtimes a day. plus dipes… but I don’t mind that part…

when I came home from work thursday afternoon… john had to go to bed… so, g and I worked on tummy time in his room… isn’t he holding his head up so well?! I’m so excited.

my favorite person to hang out with. I love this kid. love him.

took baxter out to go potty while I warmed up the car friday morning… apparently he thought he was going to get to go. I was happy I had my phone on me… this was too cute not to catch a photo…

later in the day… when I got home from work, I needed some ingredients for dinner… so, g and I had to run to the store. as you can see, he was less than thrilled. (it was bath time… he LOVES bath time…)

saturday was a work day… as usual. this is my boss’ dog… we’re buddies. this is his version of “staying dead” for a treat. notice the treat is right next to him… he’s a smart little booger.

this is one of the techs with her baby. she held g in a pic for this post weeks ago… she’s much more comfortable holding her pooch…

when I got home from work… sbish fluff mail was waiting for me! aren’t they the cutest dipes EVER?!

leaving you with my favorite pic of the week. he fell asleep clutching my finger on saturday. I took that as… he missed his mama.

did you take pics of your week with a cameraphone? join us in the fun… link up at an awesome mama blog… a good life. we’re a fun bunch!

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week nine: iphone photos…

this week started off with mama trying to get a good photo for the happy heiny’s baby of the month contest…

it took quite a few tries… but it was super fun… and how can I resist that little face?

later in the day we ended up going to sonics… what? ct has a sonics? yeah, seeing was believing… and it was mighty tasty. I’m glad he got to wear this outfit… (daddy picked it out) because he’s already almost grown out of it!

I had a really hard time leaving this to go to work tuesday morning… luckily, I only had to work until noon… so, it didn’t take much time to get back to him.

tuesday was my favorite day of the week… it was our playdate with katherine and everly. as you can see, he’s definitely a fan of katherine.

everly and I put her pants on her head. yes, I agree, she’s the cutest baby girl on the planet… even with pants on her head! (it may even add a tad to her cuteness factor…)

wednesday had a KILLER storm over here in ct… we got like two and a half feet of snow. as you can see, the jetta was covered… I’m not gonna lie, sometimes it’s nice to be snowed in…

I got to get a ton of stuff done… including diaper laundry… thanks for the help, elsie!

after her hard work, I let her take a much deserved break… oh yeah and yes… we let our furrballs on the furniture! how dare we?!

thursday I had to work all day… but I came home for lunch and look! fluff mail! I had to order this dipe because one, I’ve never heard of this brand (what?!)… and two, it’s jet black… including buttons. it’s awesome… essentially though, it’s much like a fuzzibunz… and lord knows, I’ve got plenty of those.

this is my favorite photo. I think g looks adorable in it… and this is my outfit of choice by far… I love putting a sustainablebabyish dipe on him with sbish longies and calling it a day. he likes it too… as you can see, he’s pretty relaxed here.

had to take a pic of this gnarly icicle on my way out the door to work… death by icicle anyone?

that night g and I worked on his tummy time… he was NOT a fan. but he was cute, regardless…

my boys. sigh. love them.

this little birdy has been living in our back porch. we’ve been trying to rehome him (outside) for forever… but he keeps getting in. apparently, he thought he’d test out the real inside of our house… it took us forever to get him back outside… but I have not laughed that hard in forever… watching john run around with a towel trying to catch the little creature before baxter did was highly, highly hilarious.

and that’s our week! did you take pictures of your week in phone photos? link up with us and join the fun at this awesome mommy blog. (wordpress hates the code, and it makes me want to strangle wordpress, not gonna lie.)

toodloo! see ya next week!

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love hanging out with him.

when baby’s asleep… parents will… be nerds?

this is what john looks like after three hours of sleep… and two nine hour days of daddy and grayson… oh yeah and a 10 hour shift at work… I think he looks pretty dang good for that!

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